I Once Believed I’d Never Get Better — And That Breaks My Heart Now

Two years ago, I said something in an interview that still stops me in my tracks when I hear it today:

“I accepted that I’ll never get back to the point where I was (athletically) when I was younger because it’s just not realistic.”

At the time, I truly believed that sentence. And honestly, that makes me emotional now.

When I said those words, I was deep in the middle of living with POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome) and trying to understand what was happening to my body. I was exhausted. I was dizzy. I was frustrated. And more than anything, I felt completely lost.

If you’re reading this because you’ve searched things like “Will POTS ever get better?”, “Can you exercise with POTS?”, or “POTS recovery stories”. I want you to know exactly where I was when I said that quote.

At that point in my journey, my life revolved around POTS symptoms:

• Rapid heart rate

• Lightheadedness

• Fatigue that never seemed to go away

• Passing out

• Feeling weak just from standing

I was constantly googling things like “POTS treatment options”, “POTS and exercise intolerance”, and “Can athletes return to sport with POTS?”

Most of what I found felt discouraging. There were vague answers, scary statistics, and very little guidance on how to rebuild strength safely. I wasn’t being told how to move forward, just what I might never get back.

So, I did what many people with chronic illness do: I lowered my expectations to protect myself from more heartbreak.

That quote wasn’t about giving up.It was about survival.

Looking back, I can see how small my world had become.

I had accepted a version of life where:

• My athletic career was “over”

• My body would always limit me

• Progress would be minimal, if it happened at all

I didn’t know yet that POTS is not a one-size-fits-all condition. I didn’t know how powerful the right kind of movement could be. I didn’t know about cardiac rehabilitation, structured training, or how much the nervous system can adapt. Most importantly, I didn’t know myself yet.

Elise from two years ago couldn’t imagine the life I live now.

What changed wasn’t a miracle cure or a single medication. It was learning how to:

• Work with my autonomic nervous system instead of fighting it

• Use exercise as treatment, not punishment

• Slowly rebuild tolerance through intentional training

• Respect symptoms without letting them define me

I learned that cardiac rehab for POTS, when done correctly, can be life-changing, and that many people don’t even know it exists. I learned that athletes with POTS can improve, and that progress doesn’t have to look linear to be real.

Most of all, I learned that hopelessness often comes from lack of support and lack of information, not lack of potential.

A Message to Anyone Googling POTS at 2 a.m.

If you’re reading this while feeling defeated, scared, or grieving the person you used to be, I see you.

I was you.

I once accepted a future that was far smaller than the one I live in now. Not because it was true, but because I didn’t yet know what was possible.

Your journey with POTS may look different than mine. Healing is not the same for everyone. But improvement, strength, and purpose are not off the table, even if it feels that way right now.

Two years ago, I spoke from a place of loss. Today, I speak from a place of growth.

And if there’s one thing I wish I could tell that version of myself, it’s this:

You are not done.

Your body is not broken beyond repair.

And your life can still change in ways you can’t imagine yet.

You didn’t quit.